Believe in youth’s internal compass and they will too

    If you are lucky enough to have a young person in your life, you understand what a privilege it is to see them grow into mature, thinking, dreaming, and participating individuals. Yet it can be frustrating when you feel the lessons you are teaching and the values you are trying to instill seem to fall on deaf ears. My only word for you at these times is patience. Part of growing up is learning how to navigate many different roads often with only your internal compass. It is essential to healthy development that youth venture down dirt covered roads so they can appreciate new pavement, and dip into potholes so they can know how to get themselves out. As much as we would like to walk each and every footstep with the young people we love, the reality is that one day their footprints will lead them in a solitary direction towards their dreams. Learning to be their own person with goals, values, and beliefs is critical to becoming a successful adult.
    By no means am I saying to stop expressing all those words of wisdom that you hope youth will listen to and take as their own. On the contrary, keep talking every chance you get. Let them know how you feel when you see something inappropriate or when something touches your heart. Create a supportive and caring foundation that will allow young people around you to do and be their best. Internal Assets help to make up Search Institute’s 40 Developmental Assets, the qualities, experiences, and relationships that help young people grow up healthy, caring, and responsible. Search Institute has identified the following internal assets as crucial: Commitment to Learning, Positive Values, Social Competencies, and Positive Identity.
    Internal Assets are the internal life of young people; the commitments, passions, and competencies needed to guide their choices and actions. Simply put it is the little voice inside us all that guides the decisions we make. Strengthening theses assets creates a kind of character and centeredness among youth that promotes good decision making, and minimizes risk taking behaviors such as alcohol and drug use. Research shows that young people need to internalize certain values, skills, and beliefs to embrace, enjoy and contribute to the world around them. They learn these values from the adults that surround them.
    So the next time you think twice about having the same conversation all over again about a value or belief you would like for the young person in your life to develop, remember this! Young people learn by repetition and example. Have that conversation, they are listening! They may not apply it immediately but remember life is a journey and youth are at the beginning of theirs. It takes time, experience and life lessons before you will see the fruits of your labor. Don’t stop talking. Secondly, model the values and beliefs you want to see from young people. Foster a commitment to service in youth by volunteering yourself. Youth are watching your every move. They are seeing through your actions what you value and what you do not. Take a second to look at your own behaviors; do they speak what you want youth to hear? If not it is not too late to make changes.
    Our job as adults is to guide youth in the right direction but we must allow them the space to grow. Believe in their ability to make good choices and guess what they will believe in themselves as well! Stand behind youth as they venture forth, spread their wings and soar!
    This article was brought to you by Aroostook Substance Abuse Prevention. For more information about ASAP and 40 Developmental Assets contact Allison Heidorn, developmental asset coordinator at 540-6772 or visit www.asapcoalition.com.