HOULTON, Maine — One by one, nine men and women walked to the railing on the Gateway Crossing Bridge and tossed a single daisy into the Meduxnekeag River last Thursday evening — the start of Domestic Violence Awareness Month. The night became a moment of solidarity as names were called for the nine victims of domestic violence killed over the last twelve months in Maine. The youngest victim, Joselyn Jones of Limestone, was just 3 months old when she died.
Tanya Pasquarelli of Hodgdon attended the annual walk and vigil for the first time “to support her daughter and friends.” Kelly Baston of Houlton, also there for the first time, said she attended in a show of support. “Abuse is a very serious problem and I admire the work of the Battered Women’s Project that organized this annual event,” said Christy Fitzpatrick of Houlton. The first awareness walk and vigil was held in 1991.
Before the walk to the bridge, area residents had assembled at the amphitheater in Houlton’s Monument Park for a program, “Silence the Violence.” As participants signed a guestbook and took purple ribbons from the table, they often greeted each other with an obvious shared awareness of the problem.
“Mary” who preferred to remain anonymous following court battles over visitation with her two daughters said: “I’m still affected by the abuse.” Several women said they were there to support women like “Mary.” One mother of five stated that she ended an abusive relationship and moved to Maine, bringing her five children with her.
Men also attended in a show of support; some wore the signature purple ribbon associated with domestic violence awareness. Kent Wotton of Houlton said he had been in an abusive relationship and his life improved thanks to the Battered Women’s Project help. Police Chief Butch Asselin estimated close to 100 men, women and children attended the gathering. A police escort accompanied the crowds who walked to the bridge. Pat Reardon, Battered Women’s Project shelter coordinator said “we appreciate law enforcement and the escort that allows us to walk through the town and say ‘we take a stand.’”
A solemn mood hung over the proceedings just as resolutely as the darkness on that cold, raw evening. But, the mood was tempered with recognition for survivors and those who, as Executive Director Francine Stark said, “choose not to use violence.” She said “it is very important every year to really reflect on the problem of domestic abuse and violence.” Stark added that remembering those who were killed and celebrating people who are free of violence as well as those who choose not to be violent is critical.
Karen Wotton read the personal story of a female survivor of abuse. Leslie Gervais read paragraphs of the poem “Remember My Name” alternately with synopses of Maine victims killed during episodes of domestic violence as read by Jamie Cleary. Gervais said the poem speaks to the community at large and brings attention to deadly situations. The first-person narrative of the poem concludes with “Let me know my living was not in vain.”
