Ten ways to be a better parent

    As the mother of three young children, I am constantly talking to other parents or reading up on how to deal with my children’s sometimes challenging behaviors. Most articles, books and websites on parenting tips focus on how to change your children or your children’s behavior, however, there aren’t too many places out there that focus on us…the parent. I have come to believe that the true key to happy and healthy children is actually through the parent and not the child.
    When we have children, we don’t expect to feel frustrated by them or angry with them at times. No parent wants to hurt their baby when they hear them crying or yell at their teenager when they disobey their rules. We can do better for our children by being nurturing parents. Our children need to know that they are special, loved and capable of following their dreams. We need to take care of ourselves too! We need to ask for help and take some time for ourselves even when we don’t think we have the time.
    While parenting can be tough, it is also extremely rewarding. So, try these 10 tips each day to become a better parent:
1. Help a friend, neighbor or relative. Being a parent isn’t easy. Offer a helping hand to take care of their children so the parents can rest or spend time with each other.
2. When the big and little problems of your everyday life pile up to the point you feel overwhelmed and out of control — take time out. Don’t take it out on your kid. If you want to be a better parent then make sure you take time for yourself so that you have the patience and energy to deal with the trials of being a parent.
3. It can be frustrating to hear your baby cry. Learn what to do if your baby won’t stop crying. Never shake a baby because it can result in severe injury or even death.
4. Tuck them in. Even teenagers should be tucked into bed. Whether you are going to do a whole routine with stories, songs, prayers, and what not, or you just take a minute to say good night and turn out the lights, tucking your children in helps them feel loved, and watched over.
5. Monitor your child’s television viewing because watching violent films and TV programs can harm young children.
6. Be there when they get home. One of the best things you can do to be a better parent is to be there for the cross roads in your child’s life. Even if they simply run in the door, drop their backpack and run off with their friends, knowing you will be there gives them security, and can help improve their self-esteem.
7. When your child comes in the door, it is time to do a little detective work. Part of being a good parent is knowing when there is something your child is not telling you, or if they need some extra love, support, or discipline. You can’t know that if you do not ask and listen.
8. Help with homework. A great way to be a good parent is to ensure your child feels secure about themselves, educationally, and in other aspects of their life. Help make sure they never have to feel stupid, or insecure about their abilities by helping them through their homework. You won’t know if they are struggling unless you take an active interest. If you help them you can spot areas they may need extra help with, and get them a tutor or something else.
9. Make them dinner. Eating meals as a family helps to improve your family life, and will help you be a better parent. It will ensure you know where your child is, and that they are ok. It will help you know that they are eating the right foods, it will help you to know they are ok.
10. Spend time as a family. If you want to be a good parent, make sure your child knows they have a place in your home and are important to your family. They will not seek acceptance as much in other outlets, like gangs, etc. if they feel apart of a family. So spend time as a family strengthening those bonds.
    Editor’s note: Cortney Rector is a parent educator for The Aroostook Council for Healthy Families. Her source for this article is www.parentcentral.com.